Tuesday, June 17, 2014

What Do You Say To A Naked Lady-Part 1

Imagine for a moment that you enter a room and right before your eyes is a woman and a man, and they are both completely naked. What would you say? Here are some possibilities to consider."Hello, it is so nice to see you." Another possibility is," love your outfit, is it an original?" Or how about "didn't know it was your birthday." You could say “I have an outfit just like that." How and your shoes match your outfit perfectly. And lastly, you could say "hope to see you again."

Seriously, what would YOU say? This happened to me more than once in my long hotel career. The most likely place for this to happen is when the hotel has a pool and sauna. Somehow, when some people check into a hotel they leave all inhibitions at the door. What changes happen, I don't know, but something indeed does happen. I suppose there is some deep psychological reason for such behavior, and maybe there have even been studies done. I do know that it is a regular happening at many hotels. I promise to not get too graphic, but I will share a couple of incidents with you.

It was late at night, and I was new on the job. As a matter of fact, it was one of my first hotel jobs at a very nice hotel in Salem, Oregon.I was doing the night audit, pre-computer days. The night audit at a large hotel took most of the night to do. I really loved this place. We had a full lounge with live music, a wonderful restaurant, pool, weight room, sauna, etc.

The front desk phone rang, and the guest on the other end asked if there was room service at that hour. I told him the restaurant and lounge were closed for the night, and how could I help him. He just wanted coffee for two brought to his room. He then told me he would make it worth my time if I could find a way bring up the coffee. Well, I am not opposed to making a few extra bucks, so I told him I could arrange it. I used the pot that we had in the back for the employees, and got out our best cups and saucers. Might as well get the best tip possible, right?

Coffee in hand, I took the elevator up to the third floor and knocked on the door. After a moment I heard a man's voice say,” be right there”. The door opened, and standing in front of me was a totally nude guy. He seemed not the least bothered by the fact that the flag was flying at full mast. "Put the coffee over there by the bed, " he said. I took the coffee cups over to the bed averting my eyes as much as possible.

 There, the second surprise of the night awaited me. Yes, you guessed it. Sprawled on top of the bed was a totally naked woman. Shaking, I placed the two cups of coffee on the night stand and looked for the quickest exit out of the room. The nude man walked up to me, laughed and handed me a ten dollar bill."Have a good night, and happy sex" he said as I left. Now, I ask you, what was that all about? This was a first, but by no means the last time that this would happen over the next thirty years.
I have often wondered what kind of kick these folks got out of this. Were they exhibitionists, did they just want to see the look on my face? What, I ask you, would you have said? I said the only thing possible."Have a good night." Somehow, I knew that they would.








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