Growing Up Wallace,Memories of the way we were- and anything else that crosses my mind.

Monday, March 24, 2008

With a chick chick here and a chick chick there

Yep this hotel was never lacking for excitement because of the location on Aurora Avenue.Sure, there were some normal people out there, and my hotel had very nice guests as a whole, but one never knew who or what might come wondering in off of the street.It might be a gang member, once we were invaded by the Crips from Los Angeles, or it might be one of the many dealers, or it might be a hooker, or it might be just someone down on their luck looking for a handout. It might even be an NBA player for the Sonics,I won't name names, but that did happen once,He was the center for the Sonics and stood at 7ft 2inches tall. Wow, you should have seen him trying to get though the door!Or it might be a human chicken,you just never knew.

It was a sunny Sunday afternoon, and I was back relaxing in my small apartment, just off from the front desk, It was very rare here to catch a break, and I was really enjoying my down time. Linda, my wonderful assistant manager was on the desk. Usually,Sunday afternoons were very quiet, a time for the desk to catch up on paper work, read the Times, or just relax. This Sunday afternoon appeared to be no different. Linda was reading a book, and was engrossed with it when the door opened, sending the greeting bell off.

Linda casually put down her book, and was ready to go into her greeting, when she glanced up. What she saw made her mouth drop down to the floor,probably her heart,too. For there in the doorway stood a human chicken.Yes, a human chicken, at least she thought it was human. It was either a human or Colonel Sanders had been sent back to this earth as a giant bird. As Linda gasped for something to say, I mean, what do you say to a six foot tall bird?,the creature sank down on one of the lobby chairs.It spread out it's wings, and seemed to pass out. Struggling to find her voice, Linda finally managed to croak out"You can't stay here, you will have to leave,NOW!"The Bird Man rose to his feet(or whatever they were), and stumbled back towards the doorway. Opening the door, he(it)fell down to the sidewalk in front of the hotel. By this time ,Linda was on the phone calling 911.This was where the real fun began.

Imagine if you will for a minute trying to explain to the dispatcher this particular situation."Yes, this is the Emerald Inn, and I need an officer to our hotel".Dispatcher"what is the problem, Miss".
Linda"there is a six foot tall chicken man who has fallen down in front of the hotel"By this time the dispatcher was laughing so hard that she could hardly talk.Linda heard her talking to an officer in the background saying"some crazy person is on the line saying there is a human with chicken feathers on him ". More laughter erupted on the other end of the phone. A police officer came on the line and asked Linda if she had been drinking.Linda indignantly retorted that she was indeed not drunk.They finally agreed to send officers to the hotel.Then Linda called me to alert me to this rather unusual happening.

Finally, three police cars arrived at the scene. We found out later that they had sent extra officers because they thought that they had a mental case on their hands.Only they thought it was Linda that they would be hauling to to the funny house.Soon, they found out that Linda had been telling the truth,for there,spread out on the sidewalk was a human figure totally decked out in chicken feathers,complete with wings.By this time the officers were laughing so hard that they were doubled over in glee. One of the officers approached the Bird Man, and delicately tapped him with his boot. Suddenly, Bird Man rose to his feet, and started flapping his wings. I wish that I had a camera to capture the stunned look on the officer's face. He jumped back like he had just been bitten by a rattlesnake.Bird Man then bolted for the sidewalk, northbound on Aurora Avenue.

Now, the officers did not know what to do.They quickly discussed if it was against the law to walk around with bird feather glued to your body. Nope, they concluded, it was not. No laws had been broken, One of the lady officers on the scene decided that she would tail behind him for a bit, just to observe.

We never knew the fate of the Bird Man,nor did we ever see him again. Maybe the Little People got him. Who knows. Just another day on Aurora Avenue.


Go Figure said...

That is a great story! You should do a screen play and submit to one of the sitcoms.

Cedar Street Kid said...

hey G.F.-the amazinf part is that it is tru-there are a basketful of stories from that place-I really miss it.

Go Figure said...

Best start writing then! I think you have the beginnings of a great sit com centered around such a place.

Silver Valley Girl said...

That is hilarious. I'm wondering what ever did happen to the chicken man?