The Little People.

I loved hotel management. It was my life, my passion, and oh, was it ever funny sometimes. The year was 1997, and I accepted a management job at a small, but very nice property in Seattle, I was jacked because it was a perfect situation for me. I would be doubling my income, and would have total control of the property, something most owners are not willing to do. Yes, it was a perfect job, except for one thing. This property was located at one of the most notorious intersections in Seattle,85th and Aurora, the place that drew druggies, hookers, the mentally challenged, and gangs. Why the owner had built here, I don't know, but the property stuck out like a sore thumb compared to the other tiny motels that catered to the dealers, hookers, and other assorted folks.



It was here that I had some of the funniest things happen in my entire hotel career, and believe you me, I thought I had seen it all in 25 plus years. Not! Aurora Avenue educated me like no other place since The Bronx. Where to begin? So many stories, so many characters, so --well, here we go.



My first guest that I will introduce to you was the "Leprechaun”. So, you say you don't believe in Leprechauns, well you will when I get through. He appeared to be normal, normal being a relative term on Aurora Avenue. I checked him, and found out he was a construction worker from Chicago looking for work in Seattle, This was very normal for the time because Seattle was booming. I assigned a nice room to him, and basically forgot about him for the time being. He was going to stay for a week, and I didn't' see him again for several days.



 One night he stopped by the desk when I was working, settled in a chair in the lobby, and began talking. I really enjoyed talking to my guests; it was the best part of the job. I had met thousands of interesting people in my career like Ray Charles, Ricky Nelson, Crosby Stills and Nash, senators, miners, loggers ,ladies of the evening, and on and on. I loved it all. So this guest whom I will call Bob began a casual conversation about the state of world affairs.



Everything was going fine, and I volunteered that I had read a fascinating book about how the banks, governments, and politicians were all controlled worldwide by a small group of enormously wealthy families like the Rothschilds. who  controlled when wars were fought, between whom wars were fought, and what countries got what goods. It was a great conspiracy theory. I said to Bob that I kind of believed in this conspiracy. All of a sudden, Bob was no longer a normal guest, His eyes became tiny in his head, his face became red, his breathing rapid, his fists clenching at his side.



He looked me straight in my eyes and said “so, you know about the conspiracy?"I nodded in agreement, thinking he was referring to the book I had told him about. Yes, I answered, I know.

He stood to his feet, and said that not many people knew about the” conspiracy", and how did I know about it? By now alarm bells were going off like crazy in my head. What did I have here? What had triggered this sudden change in this what I had thought was a normal guy?



"So, you know about it?", he once again asked me. By this time I was moving slowly backwards, inching towards something that I could use for a weapon should that become necessary. Taking another step towards me Bob asked again “so, you know about the little people?"What was he talking about? The Little People? What little people, I asked, now fully realizing that I was not talking to someone whose elevator went to the top floor. ‘The little people who are controlling the world". Bob said. Of course, the little people, how could I have been so ignorant to not know about the little people who were taking over the world?



Speaking in as calm voice as I could, I asked Bob how the little people were taking over the world. His answer made a lot sense."They look for people who are tall, cut off their legs and put them on themselves “Of course, now it was clear as sparkling crystal to me. Bob then said that the Little People had been chasing him all over the country because he knew about them. Trying to keep him at bay, I asked if he had gone to the authorities. Of course he had. He had gone to the FBI in Chicago, but he found out that they were all Little People, and now the entire FBI was after him.



 Looking me straight in the eyes, Bob then said “maybe you are one, too."Now, I am not a giant, but I was six feet tall and weighed at that time 210 pounds, so I didn't think that I was a a little people. "No", I quickly assured him. I was not one of them. Bob then said I had better be careful because I was in danger of losing my legs if "they “found out that I now knew about them.



Well, I had had about enough for tonight, so I told Bob that I had some accounting to do . Bob seemed to take that gracefully, and told me that we would talk more later. Sounded good to me.



 I went in and called a a lady friend of mine and told her the story. I asked her, if she had ever heard of such a thing. She said of course she had, and that Bob was talking about Leprechauns. I then asked the obvious question “don’t tell me you believe in Leprechauns?"Of course they are real she assured me. Now, I felt totally crazy. Maybe there were things I didn't know about how the world was run, maybe the Little People were real. Maybe I was in real danger, or maybe the whole world had gone insane and I was the only sane person left.



I never engaged Bob in conversation again. Every time that he came into the lobby, I pretended that I was extremely busy. After a few days, Bob got the hint that he was not really wanted there anymore and check out. He moved to a little shanty of a motel down the street that catered to people who were not playing cards with a full deck. I never saw him again.



But now I am aware. Now I know who really controls the world. You, too beware. The Little People might just be watching you, stalking you, preparing to cut off your legs. You have been warned. Be afraid; be very, very, afraid.