----ACTUAL QUOTES FROM MEDICAL RECORDS
The following quotes were taken from actual medical records
dictated by physicians.
-By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and hehttp://www.copd-international.com/Library/newsletters/1-10.htm
was feeling better.
-Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
-On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had
completely disappeared.
-She has had no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she
was very hot in bed last night.
-Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.
-The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears
to be depressed.
-Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
-The patient has no past history of suicides.
-Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.
-She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate
directions in early December.
-Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.
-The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane
ran out of gas and crashed.
-Since she can't get pregnant with her husband, I thought you would
like to work her up.
-She is numb from her toes down.
-While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.
-Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
-Patient was alert and unresponsive.
-When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room
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2 comments:
Cedar: Great stuff...! I have a few favorites I will try to remember to post. ha.
I am looking forward to it, GF, I imagine that you have read some very funny things. Leon used to work admissions in a specialized hospital in Santa Barbara. He said that Physicians certainly have their own way of writing.
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